Reset to Zero, Walking into the Unknown

These last 15 days have been very trying. The theme of the month is resetting. WHOA. I really have had some major resets in my immediate family, as well as in my life. I have been air-headed, irritable, edgy, NON motivated in my head, and this is not like me at all. I feel like sleeping all the time, and still have three businesses to run, two kids, a hubby, three dogs two cats and the list of responsibilities goes on.

Link to the video of the talent show HERE

 My mother in law, Ginny, had a Traumatic Brain Injury on 10/2/13 and she had to be rushed to the ER on the ambulance. We thought she had a stroke. She had just left getting an MRI as she does every year, since she is a multiple myloma cancer survivor. She apparently was really freaked out about the MRI and didn’t eat or sleep before the procedure. Afterward they went to eat at a Wendy’s restaurant. She ordered a large meal, seemed to be very hungry, and went to wash her hands, and took her rings off leaving them on the bathroom sink. She must have fallen and someone heard it, we don’t know if she passed out or fell. When she did she shattered the commode and it was pulled out from the wall, flooding water everywhere. The manager unlocked the door and they found her on the ground, Dick, my father in law picked her up and she said she didn’t feel well and wanted to go home. He said, ‘Im calling you an ambulance’, and he followed. By the time family arrived she could only talk gibberish and was getting extremely frustrated, working herself up trying desperately to communicate to my sister in law, Val. They sedated her for her own safety.

She was immediately put in ICU then moved to NCCU and has been there since. She has not been able to wake on her own, as when she does attempt to regain any sort of consciousness her blood pressure goes skyrocket and her heart races. They are keeping her medicated, and have had to intubate her, and feed her with a tube. She had surgery on 10/3 to remove the blood from her brain and between the brain and skull and she did well. However, no one has been able to know if she is really going to be the same person we knew, if she will ever wake up at all, if she will walk, talk, laugh. Rich, and his two sisters are greatly concerned and his dad, Dick, and her BFF Roger haven’t left her side at NCCU. She is having a tracheotomy within the next 24 hours and inserting a feeding tube.

Today my niece drove up from college in Houston to see her Mimi, and as soon as Rich arrived to the hospital Dick gave him and Ashley a list of possible places to move Ginny. Rich has been really trying to hold it all in, and today felt a huge responsibility to find his mom a great place to be cared for. He and Ashley interviewed Baylor Specialty and Charlton MEthodist. Both are coincidentally his clients, as he has aquariums at both locations he cares for with his company The Fish Physician.

They chose Charlton and really feel great about the decision. He came home feeling really happy that she is leaving NCCU. I have seen my own mother’s body digress with 8 years of cancer, remission, cancer, remission, surgery, healing, surgery, radiation, chemo chemo chemo and more fucking chemo… and all the by-products of ‘treatment’ and surgery and all the shit that goes with the hospital, the doctors and the BS. It is a horrible route… and there isn’t any other choice.

I am saddened and know that Ginny does not want her family to suffer. I am hoping for the best for her and we all continue to pray as we step in to this bleak unknown, as we learn to love and hold each other, as we support each other and pray together. I pray that this brings this family to God and to each other, and hold faith that this, too is Divine plan, that this too will blossom something greater and beautiful from this deep darkness.

This too shall pass.